117. Calling a spade a tool designed primarily for the purpose of digging or removing earth..

6th February 2011. Those of a sensitive nature can skip the first part of this post..! Walking into town for the bread with the dog on this fine sunny morning I needed one of those small black plastic bags that the Town Hall has thoughtfully provided around town for dog-owners. Pulling one out of the dispenser, I couldn't help noticing the sign provided for our edification. With customary Gallic disdain for any terminological inexactitude coupled with their predilection for linguistic precision (Sir Humphrey would be proud of me!), it announced that these bags are intended for "déjections canines". It's clear that a sizeable number of the populace are having trouble even comprehending the sign, judging from the copious amounts of déjections canines that lavishly decorate the streets. Given that France has the highest dog population in Europe, this adds up to more than a "hill of beans" - as Bogart might have said. You only need to look at this site to recognise that it's a problem in France.

It's not helped by the fact that many dog-owners live in flats in the centre of town and thus don't have gardens where their pooches can roam. Bayonne is otherwise a clean and litter-free town, as can be seen from this live video feed. Phew - let's move on!

Trois Couronnes

As it was a sunny and bright afternoon, we drove south down to Saint-Jean-de-Luz to have a stroll in the early February sunshine. Along the distant horizon, the Pyrenees and the pale mass of La Rhune and the Trois Couronnes emerged above the silver blue haze like the faintest of shadows against an even paler blue sky.

La Rhune

Saint Jean de Luz was busy.. with many people sunbathing on the beach and even a couple of brave souls in the sea. We found a small gallery that was open that was showing some very interesting portraits by Joaquim Hidalgo, a Madrid-based artist.. slightly reminiscent of Gustav Klimt.

7th February 2011. A few weeks ago I mentioned here the disturbing story of the decline in numbers of the world's honey bee population. Before you glaze over and move on, it's worth remembering that almost a third of global farm output depends on animal pollination, largely by honey bees. These foods provide 35% of our calories, most of our minerals, vitamins, and anti-oxidants, and the foundations of gastronomy. Yet the bees are dying – or being killed – at a disturbing pace. More here.. A quote from Albert Einstein on the matter: "if the bee disappeared off the surface of the globe, man would have only four years to live". In my view, the disappearance of the honey bee is a greater threat in the short term to the continuance of life as we know it on the planet than those posed by global warming, ozone holes, depletion of oil supplies, terrorism or whatever you want. The strange thing is that the fate of the world's honey bee population doesn't seem to be too high up on anyone's political agenda, anywhere.

The media buzzword for this phenomenon is "Colony Collapse Disorder" or CCD - which doesn't sound quite so threatening - so if you are lucky enough to hear CCD being discussed, at least you'll know what it stands for and why we should be so concerned. Like to know more..? Start here, here, then read the Scientific American here, a report from the Congressional Research Service here and finally here's what the EU is doing. I'd suggest you write to your elected representative without delay to:

1. Make sure that they are aware of the threat posed by CCD;

and

2. Ask what they are doing about it.

You can find out how to contact your MP (UK) here or your Representative (US) here.

Does the word Bugatti mean anything to you..? A couple were sold over the weekend by Bonhams in Paris for a substantial wodge. There's a nice little story and a video clip of one of them being driven here.. I'm unable to post the clip here unfortunately. I must say that I twitched when the narrator said the cars were Italian - I'd always thought they were French but looking at the Wiki page, I think you could be excused for saying Italian French or even German. These beautifully built, jewel-like cars were the Lotuses of their day.. built with lightness being the key to their performance. I think it was Ettore Bugatti himself who, at the time of the domination of the Le Mans 24 hour race by the supercharged Bentleys, declared that they were "the fastest lorries in the world!" From an English perpective, that's a real knuckle-clenching comment to absorb brought up as we are with the Bentley Boys legend - but unfortunately it's true.. The modern Bugatti company is now owned by - would you believe it - Volkswagen.

116. Six Nations

6th February 2011. Good result for the England XV in the opening match of the Six Nations on Friday night in a hyped-up Millennium Stadium in Cardiff. A very physical, aggressive and confrontational match with the Welsh was not helped IMHO by all the hype that went on before the game. I must admit to an intense dislike for all that pre-match hoop-la that we get these days. I think the worst two offenders for it are Wales and Scotland. On Friday night, we had complete overkill - with a Welsh male voice choir, sheets of flame that would do an oil rig proud, all the dry ice 'smoke' and lights at the players tunnel, Tom Jones hits belting out on the sound system, military goats, the announcer reading out the players names in the manner of a bingo caller et al.. To me it's all so unnecessary. I don't need to be pumped up artificially by all this nonsense. Don't mention warbling sopranos singing the anthems either.. aaagghh! At Twickenham, we get most, if not all, of this and the same announcer who reads out the players names in the manner of a bingo caller. Who on earth thinks this is a good idea?

It's the same in Scotland - a lone piper standing up on the roof somewhere, more fireworks, smoke and mirrors, overflights by the RAF, and then that awful maudling "Flower of Scotland" - great when sung by the Corries before a crowd of 'folkies' - but, at the risk of annoying those north of the border, as a national anthem it leaves a lot to be desired - "And send them homeward, tae think again.." - in your dreams. What's needed is the rambunctious "Scotland the Brave.." or the "Black Bear". Sing something positive and rousing that lifts the spirits - not some dreary folk song cocking an eye to the past. Accept no substitutes. Here's a clip that captures all that's best about Scotland.. and it makes me shiver listening to it even now..

 

In the interests of balance (been watching too much BBC) I have to say, and it might be viewed as heresy in some quarters, but "God Save the Queen" wouldn't inspire me to crush a paper cup.. Needless to say, the ones that get my vote are the Marseillaise, Fratelli d'Italia, Land of my Fathers (Wales) and both of the Irish ones.

As I made my way down to the river early yesterday morning it was marginally less cold than it's been over the last few weeks - I hope we've seen the last of that cold spell. I went out in an VIII set up for rowing (ie, with one oar each). It was one of those strange sorties that comes along every now and again when, with a club crew who have rowed together before, it didn't seem to matter what exercise we did or corrective action we took, the boat remained chronically unstable, without any of us being able to put a finger on what was going wrong. It made for an uncomfortable sortie. Did 12km (running total: 418km) 

115. Fête de la Chandeleur aka Pancake Tuesday

2nd February 2011. Today was la Fête de la Chandeleur or, as we poetic Anglo-Saxons would have it, Pancake Tuesday - although strictly speaking, its correct title should be Candlemas, but between you and me, let's stick to Pancake Tuesday.. (I was way off here.. Lesley pointed out in a comment below that La Chandeleur and Pancake Day/Tuesday are two different things.. La Chandeleur is Candlemas but Pancake Day/Tuesday is Shrove Tuesday which is the day preceding Ash Wednesday and falls on 8th March this year. There'll be a test afterwards to see if you were paying attention!) 

Anyway, here's what pancakes look like here in France: 

This evening, Madame was ensconced in the kitchen for a good while - which was strictly off limits and Streng Verboten! to the likes of me and the dog. (Un Angliche in the kitchen..? Beh non!) She appeared briefly in order to raid the bookcase for a bottle of rum and other delights - making my nose twitch with the tempting smells that wafted out of the kitchen..

Draw your own conclusion!

Then, as if by magic, the pancakes started arriving.. first, the savoury ones.. with ham and cheese. Think I might have had two of those.. Next up, was one with a black cherry filling.. then I think I had - it all starts to become a blur round about this point - a chocolate one. Or was it two? Finally, with a drum roll, one that had been flamed in rum. Yum-yum - or as they say here - miam miam!

I remember Pancake Tuesdays from when I was a kid and they were usually served with lemon juice and sugar at home.. which I'd still enjoy very much. 

In any discussion of pancakes, Pat Buchanan's crack about Bill Clinton during his first Presidential campaign always springs to mind - it ran something like: "Bill Clinton's foreign policy experience stems mainly from having breakfast at the International House of Pancakes.."

Here's "On Every Street" - a classic Mark Knopfler track that I haven't played in a long while:

114. My Rs

26th January 2011. In any discussion about the pros and cons of a permanent move to France, it generally doesn't take long before the knotty subject of actually speaking French raises its head. If the new arrival is serious about integrating with the local community, then it's a given that he or she must do so in the language of Molière. One of the difficulties is that while grammar, vocabulary, verbs (& tenses thereof) can all be learnt from a book, French pronunciation is a totally different matter - and it's made more complicated by the fact that we Angliche (or perhaps it's just me!) tend to continue to sound individual letters more or less exactly as they are spoken in English.

Don't believe me..? Well, the acid test for me is to try pronouncing any French word containing an 'r'. We pronounce 'r' in English either as "aah" or as a soft "ruh" - whereas in French it's pronounced as "airrr" with the 'r' an almost trilled rattly sound in the throat (or, as it says here, a voiced uvular fricative sound). The problem for us Rosbifs is that that sound doesn't exist in English. If I concentrate hard, I can manage it but slipping that - alien to me - sound into a long sentence invariably catches me out. There are a couple of words that always cause me grief: "serrurier" (locksmith) and another is the "RER" - the fast Metro in Paris.

I know I've quoted P. G. Wodehouse's observation on this before but he understood the problem perfectly: 

“Into the face of the young man who sat on the terrace of the Hotel Magnifique at Cannes there had crept a look of furtive shame, the shifty, hangdog look which announces that an Englishman is about to talk French.”

29th January 2011. Putting all thoughts of French pronunciation on the back burner for now, here's a real travel bargain from SNCF - and I quote:

"Dès le 24 janvier, avec Lunéa, profitez de l’Hiver à prix Fou, à partir de 19€ (1) en couchette 2nde classe pour tous vos voyages en France!

A SAISIR! EN VENTE DU 24 JANVIER AU 14 FEVRIER 2011 POUR DES VOYAGES DU 27 JANVIER AU 6 AVRIL 2011.

Prem's price Lunéa tax (including 3€ online reduction), from per person for a one-way 2nd class sleeper with Lunéa on a selection of destinations and the availability of seats at this fare. Tickets are on sale from January 24 to February 14, 2011, for travel between January 27 and April 6, 2011. Tickets are non-exchangeable, non refundable, on sale until 3 days before train departure. Online payment required with ticket to print yourself, send free ticket home, withdrawal self-service kiosk in French train stations, or SNCF Rail Europe (extra 10€ per folder). Offer not valid with any other promotion or discount rate station.

"Wot's that all abaht?" I hear you say.. In a nutshell: cheap overnight sleeper tickets from 19€ (couchette) on sale from 24th January 2011 to 14th February 2011 for all trips from 27th Jan '11 to 6 Apr '11. All the details here..

I'd suggest you book your ticket to the Pays Basque and start brushing up your pronunciation right now!

29th January 2011. Meanwhile, out on the river on another cold morning, this time in an VIII sculler - up to the turnaround and back, only stopping for the turn. (Phew!) 14km (Running total: 406km)